How Smartphones Affect Relationships - The Muse

How Smartphones Affect Relationships - The MuseHow Smartphones Affect RelationshipsIve never seen my co-worker Allen use a phone. I know he has one Ive called and texted him, and he asked my opinion on the iPhone 6 versus the Plus. But those are my only clues to its existence, because Allen has a strict no-phones-around-others policy.That means he will not touch his phone, under any conditions, unless hes alone.When Allen first revealed his boycott, I thought he was crazy. I check my phone all the time, whether Im with other people or not- out of necessity. How else am I supposed to stay on top of a constant flood of emails, social media updates, texts, and calls? However, when I started watching Allen interact with the other people in ur office, I thought maybe he was onto something. No matter who Allen was talking to- a client, our boss, another professional- that person seemed really engaged in the conversation. So I decided to (literally) pocket my phone for a week. Heres what ha ppened.1. People Copied MeI spent four hours straight with one of my colleagues finishing an extremely important project. It was incredibly difficult, but I kept my phone in my pocket the whole time. And for the most part, so did she.This particular co-worker is a pretty active social media user, so I was really surprised to see her be so hands-off. However, over the course of the week, I saw this effect again and again- when people pull out their devices and you dont, not only do they feel pressured to put them away again more quickly, but theyre also far less likely to re-check them.We ended up finishing our project sooner than anticipated, in part because without the interruptions of our screens, we were able to find a flow and maintain it. The productivity boost was totally worth responding to emails a few hours later than I would have normally.The take-away Putting away your phone makes everyone more efficient.2. People Liked Talking to Me moraI didnt tell anyone about my phone ban, and no one said anything. Whether or not they consciously noticed, however, people really seemed to respond. They could tell they had my undivided attention- not only was I not doing that half-nod, half-scroll thing, but I wasnt even thinking about checking my phone. My listening skills went through the roof.As a result, people were much more engaged. When we were discussing something light-hearted, they smiled and laughed more. When we were talking about something serious, they were more honest and thoughtful.I even noticed people initiating conversations with me more. Instead of just saying, Hows it going? as they passed by me in the hall, theyd stop and ask what project I was working on or what my plans were the weekend were. The take-away Putting away your phone makes people feel appreciated and respected.3. People Trusted Me MoreWell, according to the research. Studies show using your phone around someone else makes you seem less trustworthy and less empathetic.In additio n, even having a phone in view hurts our relationships- whether you check it or not.According to the scientists who conducted the study, Cell phones may serve as a reminder of the wider network to which we could connect, which leads to lower relationship quality and less closeness.The take-away Putting away your phone will help deepen your relationships.Since discovering these benefits, Ive decided to follow Allens lead all the time. Im not going to lie, its challenging These strategies make it a little easierI turn my phone off if I know Im about to be with other people.I stow my phone in my bag, rather than my pocket, so its harder to access.I pretend Im playing a game in which I get money for every phone-free interaction.I remind myself of the long-term gratification of building better relationships.If I know someone is waiting to hear back from me (or vice versa), while Im still alone, Ill send a quick email explaining how long Ill be unavailable. If something is really urgent, Ill keep my phone in my pocket, excuse myself to the restroom, and check it in there. Its not ideal, but at least the people Im with dont see me using it.Occasionally, Ill miss an important email or return a call a little late. However, nothing has happened thats made me regret not checking my phone. I may be a little harder to reach virtually, but in-person? Im all yours- and my personal and professional relationships have never been better. Photo of people walking courtesy of Shutterstock.

Tips for Success on Your First Day at a New Job

Tips for Success on Your First Day at a New JobTips for Success on Your First Day at a New JobTips for Success on Your First Day at a New JobPlay your cards right on your first day and youll be koranvers to make a great impression.You got the call, negotiated a salary, and finally landed the job youve been trying to nail down. Congratulations This is the time for optimism and excitement. Could this be the job that truly launches your career?Now its time to get focused. If this truly is your big break, you want to make the most of it right out of the gate. That means that your very first day is crucial it can set the tone for how your boss and your co-workers binnensee you. Making a good first impression matters most right now, so there are a few things to do before starting a new job to make it a success. Thats no reason to stress out and put extra pressure on yourself. Just get yourself ready to rock your first day on the job with these simple tips.Dress the partEven if you take gr eat pride in your eclectic style, you may want to wait awhile to ease into that. Chances are there will be some guidelines in the company handbook that can help in choosing your first-day-of-work outfit. If you dont have that yet, you can still head to their website and look at what employees are wearing in pictures.Are they business casual or straight up business? Maybe this company is mora laid back and jeans are the norm. Whatever you see, you want to dress accordingly to be certain that your outfit is appropriate for your job. If you have any doubts, always err on the side of formal when choosing your gesamtheit for your first day. Youd rather be a little too dressy than too casual.Plan your commuteThis one simple step can save you a lot of embarrassment and help you make a good first impression. One of the smartest things to do before starting a new job is mapping out your best route to your new workplace in advance. Pay attention to how much traffic is on your route during the morning commute. If you really want to be safe, get up one morning and give it a test run. Also, pay attention to any special events that could throw a wrench in that days traffic. However long you decide your commute will take you, leave at least 10 minutes early on your first real day of work. Showing up a little early is okay, but being late on day one starts things off on the wrong foot in a big way.If you need a little help, there are lots of great phone apps to make your commute a little easier.Be ready to work or notOur best new job advice be ready for anything Some supervisors like to start out new hires by throwing them into the fire. If that ends up being the case, be ready to jump in and show your stuff. Ask questions, but dont be afraid to do some problem solving on your own. The type of boss that likes to start things off that quickly usually wants to see how well you can handle yourself on the fly.On the flip side, it could also happen that your new company hands you a bunch of orientation werkstoff and then leaves you alone. What will you do? Before you get there, think about what kinds of things you want to know about your new company. Chances are the answers are in those orientation materials. Know ahead of time what kind of information you want to find.Be friendlyBeing friendly is one of the best ways to make a good impression. As opportunities arise throughout the day to talk to people, do so. Theyll likely ask you about yourself, but be sure to also ask about them as well. Have your 30-second elevator pitch ready, but after that, shift the focus off of you. Get to know what they do and what they like. Asking questions about the person youre talking to makes you instantly more likable than the person who just wants to talk about him or herself. Smile as much as you can while still feeling like youre not faking it. Everyone likes a smile.Related 5 Tips for Making Friends at WorkRemember namesThis piece of new-job advice can be tricky. Youll likely be meeting a lot of people throughout your first day. Remembering names is easy for some, but for others, its a real struggle. When you are introduced to someone new, try not to focus on their clothes or hairstyle but instead focus on their words. When they say their name, repeat it to yourself several times in your head. If you are one of those people who struggle with names, there are lots of little tricks out there to help you get better at it. See if you can find one that works for you.Accept that lunch invitationIf youre lucky, your boss or some co-workers will invite you to go to lunch. This tip for starting a new job is a no-brainer go Lunch is a great opportunity to converse in a more casual setting. Youll learn more about the people you are eating with and possibly get an inside look at how the office works. If the conversation turns towards office gossip, do not engage. Pay attention to who does the most talking and make note of it. Ask plenty of questions. This i s a great time to get to know your new co-workers beyond their job descriptions.That said, you may want to bring a lunch just in case its expected that you dont leave for your afternoon meal. Just be willing to let it go if you do get that invite.Know the companys recent successesEducate yourself ahead of time by conducting some research familiarize yourself with what this company does well and what projects have been recent successes. You may have done this to wow them during your interview, but its still good information for when you are introduced to people and worth refreshing. Perhaps youll meet one of the individuals who was named as a key player. Giving quick kudos and asking a smart question about their project will impress them quickly. Who doesnt like to talk about their home runs?Find out who youll be working with the mostAs you meet people throughout your first day, try to discern who is going to become a part of your daily life at the company and who may be less involv ed in your work. Then, make an extra effort to get to know those who youll be working with closely. Ask questions so youre sure that you understand exactly what they do and how their role connects with yours. By doing this you can eliminate embarrassing job-role mistakes right away. Getting off on the right foot with team members can help set the right tone for your new job moving forward.Your first day at your new job should be exciting, not frightening. As long as youre prepared with a plan going in, youll do great. Keep the focus on learning and making a good first impression. If all goes well, the people you meet on your first day could be the people youll work with for years to come. Start things off on the right foot by having a plan and expecting the best.Click on the following link for more advice on getting ahead.Make sure your resume will land you the new job. Get a free resume critique to see how you stack upRecommended Reading6 Ways to Impress Your BossStarting a New Job ? 7 Tips to Ensure Your SuccessHow and When to Ask for Feedback in the Workplace

Finding Work When Underemployed

Finding Work When UnderemployedFinding Work When UnderemployedOne of the most frustrating situations can occur when you are not getting paid what you are worth. Many people settle on a job out of college to gain experience and stay with it, even if they are not being paid to use all of their skills. This is a common, but seriouscareer mistake. During difficult economic times, many people settle for jobs that pay less than they would normally just to have a steady source of income. You may be ready tomove on to a new jobright now. Consider Looking Outside of Your Company However, once you are in this cycle it can be difficult to break out of it since many jobs look at your previous salary to determine your new salary. It can be especially difficult to move up within the same business if you are in this situation. While you may be looking for opportunities within the same company you may be mora successful looking for a job with a different company because you can apply for jobs th at you are qualified for without being pigeonholed by your last title. Make Sure Your Certifications and Skills Are Current It is important to keep your skills and your certifications current even if you are not using them in your current position. The more skills you have available to you the more jobs you will be qualified to apply for. You should also keep an up to date resume available so that when you hear about the perfect job you can apply for it. Look for Work While at Your Current Job Continue tolook for workwhile you are working at your current position. You may want to stay a year in order to show your new company that you will not just jump ship for a better offer. It is also a good way to network for a job with another company. A co-worker may know of an opening somewhere else and be willing to recommend you and clients may be able to give you recommendations to another company or tell you about different job offers. Consider Using a Career Coach If you have had a difficult time getting called back for interviews in the past, you should consult with acareer coachto improve your resume and cover letter. Each cover letter needs to be unique to the job you apply for and should contain specifics to the company and position. If you are getting called in for interviews, but not making the next round, you may need to practice your interviewing skills. A career coach can help with this as well. Stick to a Bare-Bones Budget Now While you are looking for a better job, you do need to live on your current salary andstick to a bare bones budget.Some companies will pull a credit check to make sure you are a good candidate. Having too much debt can be a flag and may lose you the job next to a nearly identical candidate. If you currently have a large amount of debt, you may want to take on a second job to clean it up so you can qualify for a better position.Establish good financial habits now to help you get through this difficult time, so being u nderemployed does not take you too far off track. Ask for a Raise Another frustration can occur when your company continues to add responsibilities to your position, without increasing your pay. They may be taking advantage of your skill set, but are still unwilling to pay. First, you shouldask for a raise, and point out the additional duties you have taken on since you were first hired. If they do not give you the raise, be sure to add the added responsibilities to your resume and continue looking for a new job. It is important to keep a positive attitude at your current position since they can contact your supervisor to see how well you work. Create a Plan to Help You Find a Dream Job Take the time to figure out your ideal job, and prepare yourself for it. If you settled on a job now, and you are making enough to get by, you can take the time to figure out exactly what you want to do. People often think they will enjoy a field of work, but once they begin that job, they re alize it is not fulfilling. You can switch your career, but you need to prepare to do it. List the additional skills and experiences you need to complete in order to qualify for the position you want. Then work on that list while you look for the ideal position. You need to be ready to decide if yournew job offer is worth the riskof leaving your secure job behind. Be Patient and Dont Give Up It will take time to find a better position. The higher paying the position, the longer it may take you to find it. However, if you continue to look and stay an active part of any related professional organizations you should be able to find the right job eventually. Keep a positive attitude at your current job but be ready to apply as soon as you find the position you are looking for. You will need to prepare a plan to help yourecover from being underemployedonce you find your new job.